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Monday, March 8, 2004 - Editor: Jerry
Call me George.
George Carlin has been cited as the author of the Paradox of Time,
which you have probably read elsewhere. Carlin didn't write it. He
calls it "a sappy load of shit." This issue of the Highlights features
the Paradox of Time and draws from an Urban Legends web page --
http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/paradox.asp -- which explains
who the author is and his backround.
The real author of The Paradox of Time is Bob Moorehead. "(During
Moorehead's) tenure as pastor of Overlake Christian Church, seventeen
members of his congregation reported that he had sexually assaulted
them. These allegations, which surfaced in 1997, prompted his
resignation in 1998. After a year of publicly supporting Moorehead the
church elders withdrew their support, their own investigation into the
charges having led them to conclude their pastor had indeed been guilty
of molesting a number of male churchgoers."
As George Carlin says, "We're all fucked. It helps to remember that."
Following The Paradox of Time, I've included several more quotes
directly from the website of George Carlin:
http://www.georgecarlin.com/georgecarlin/home/home.html, some of which
seem crude but amazingly true and sane. These quotes are not likely to
be sent to everyone in your address book.
The Paradox of Time, by Bob Moorehead
The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but
shorter tempers, wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend
more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy less.
We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less
time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less
judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too
little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too
tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have
multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.
We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We've learned
how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not
life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have
trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbour.
We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things,
but not better things. We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul.
We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice.
We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've
learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more
information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less
These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small
character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days
of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes.
These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality,
one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from
cheer, to quiet, to kill.
It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in
the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and
a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit
Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not
going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word to someone who
looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up
and leave your side.
Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is
the only pleasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a
Remember, to say, "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but
most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes
from deep inside of you.
Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person
will not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak, and
give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the
moments that take our breath away.
Okay, now that you feel all good and superior, here are the grounded
observations of George Carlin, not the airy fairy stuff of someone who
had 17 men accuse him of abusing them.
There ought to be at least one round state.
In comic strips the person on the left always speaks first.
Why can't there be more suffering?
Where does the Dentist go when he leaves the room?
I almost don't feel the way I do.
There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
Fuck soccer moms.
Human beings are kind of interesting from birth until they reach the
age of a year and a half. Then they are boring until they reach fifty.
By that time they're either completely defeated and fucked up, which
makes them interesting again, or they've learned how to beat the game,
and that makes them interesting too.
Ross perot. Just what a nation of idiots needs; a short, loud idiot.
The bigger they are, the worse they smell.
No one can ever know for sure what a deserted area looks like.
Baseball is the only major sport that appears backwards in a mirror.
I like sports because I enjoy knowing that many of these macho athletes
have to vomit before a big game. Any guy who takes a job where you
gotta puke first is my kind of guy.
Sties are caused by watching your dog shit.
We're all fucked. It helps to remember that.
If you love someone, set them free; if they come home, set them on
Most people are not particularly good at anything.
Those who dance are considered insane by those who can't hear the
I never eat sushi. I have trouble eating things that are merely
The only good thing to come out of religion was the music.
Now you know why George Carlin doesn't want to be identified as the
author of The Paradox of Time.
Spiritually Incorrect Enlightenment, by Jed McKenna
the following excerpt are from Moby-Dick:
Moby-Dick, viewed aright, is a very simple story: Man, Ocean and Whale
are Ego, Universe and Delusion. Fire is negation. Everything else is
everything else. Ahab is in sole command of his ship on the sea of the
infinite, launched on a kill-or-die quest to win his freedom. Armed
with pure intent and a weapon "tempered in blood, and tempered by
lightning," Ahab brings his entire being to bear on this one single
purpose. The white whale is Ahab's dragon; his current layer of
ignorance. It doesn't matter what the dragon represents, only that it
exists. As long as there is a dragon, there's an Ahab, and as long as
there's an Ahab, the hunt goes on.
The following items are true of both Ahab and the individual who has
taken the First Step and is in the process of awakening; the Break-Out
-- Ahab possesses purity of intent: Monomania.
-- Ahab acts, but does not reflect on the fruit of the act.
-- Ahab is imperious; sovereign and self-sovereign.
-- Ahab is amoral.
-- Ahab has lost a significant, irreplaceable part of himself.
-- Ahab knows he is alone. He says: "Ahab stands alone amid the
millions of the peopled earth, nor gods nor men his neighbors!"
-- Ahab has undergone a radical transformation: "Ahab and anguish lay
stretched together in one hammock, rounding in mid winter that dreary,
howling Patagonian Cape; then it was, that his torn body and gashed
soul bled into one another; and so interfusing, made him mad."
-- Ahab's objective is not, as it appears, the whale. The whale is just
in the way: "If man will strike, strike through the mask! How can the
prisoner reach outside except by thrusting through the wall? To me, the
white whale is that wall, shoved near to me. Sometimes I think there's
naught beyond. But 'tis enough."
Further, come what may. That's what Ahab is saying. Those are the
orders he sails under. It really has nothing to do with the whale.
That's why no consensus has ever been arrived at as to what the whale,
and the whiteness of the whale, represent. Beyond our furthest charted
regions, where it is written, "Here be dragons!" is where this hunt
takes us. Each person's white whale is whatever keeps them from
advancing in that direction.
Ahab is hyper-Promethean in his defiance. Stealing fire from the gods
is petty larceny compared to stealing illusion from Maya: "Thou canst
blind; but I can then grope. Thou canst consume; but I can then be
ashes. Take the homage of these poor eyes, and shutter-hands. I would
not take it. The lightning flashes through my skull; mine eye-balls
ache and ache; my whole beaten brain seems as beheaded, and rolling on
some stunning ground... There is some unsuffusing thing beyond thee,
thou clear spirit to whom all thy eternity is but time, all thy
creativeness mechanical. Through thee, they flaming self, my scorched
eyes do dimly see it."
-- Ahab is driven, not drawn. He does not act from desire. He is not
pulled by the lure of some imagined betterment of self or world. He is
not motivated by altruism or self-interest.
-- Ahab cannot be swerved from his purpose: "Swerve me? The path to my
fixed purpose is laid with iron rails, whereon my soul is grooved to
run. Over unsounded gorges, through the rifled hearts of mountain,
under torrents' beds, unerringly I rush! Naught's an obstacle, naught's
an angle to the iron way!"
-- Nor can he swerve himself: "This whole act's immutable decreed.
'Twas rehearsed by thee and me a billion years before this ocean
rolled. Fool! I am the Fates' lieutenenant; I act under orders."
-- Ahab is lashed to the front of a speeding locomotive hurtling toward
imminent collision. He is a force of nature, a tidal wave that started
as a minor oceanic event and which has swelled to a magnitude that can
erase cities from the earth. "Nothing personal," says the wave, "it's
immutable decreed." And so it is.
"All your oaths to hunt the White Whale are as binding as mine; and
heart, soul, and body, lungs and life, old Ahab is bound."
Here, five important expressions of the Break-Out Archetype are voiced
by Ahab in the space of five sentences:
"I'd stike the sun if it insulted me. For could the sun do that, then
could I do the other; since there is ever a sort of fair play therein,
jealousy presiding over all creations. But not my master, man, is even
that fair play. Who's over me? Truth hath no confines."
That first sentence deserves a chapter of its own.
"I'd strike the sun if it insulted me."
"I will fight whatever enemy is before me," Ahab is effectively saying.
"I am moving forward and whatever stands in my way is therefore my
enemy and I will throw myself unreservedly against it." The battle is
absolute, and because the goal is always forward progress, whatever is
in the way is always what the battle is against. The goal is not
survival or happiness or continued well-being. There is only one goal
and it is always the same: Further.
The second idea conveyed, that there is ever a sort of fair play
herein, is a critical observation that is at the very heart of one's
ability to stand up and fight the fight. The jealousy presiding over
all creations can be understood as the balance of opposites as in the
yin-yang symbol, but the fact that Ahab understands that no task before
us can be beyond us demonstrates a profound grasp of a rule that
applies to all but is known by few: The universe always plays fair. If
we must, we can.
"But not my master, man, is even that fair play."
That fair play is the balance of opposites; causality, action and
reaction, the dualistic universe. Ahab is, in effect, declaring that he
The fourth important point to be drawn from this excerpt comes from
"Who's over me?"
Those may sound like the words of a megalomaniac, but in Ahab it's not
ego talking. It's a man declaring his self-sovereignty, which is
well-established in the heart and mind of the Break-Out Archetype.
Anyone found over us would merely represent another obstacle to our
The fifth insight worth noting in this passage is this:
"Truth hath no confines."
This perfect statement is the diamond heart of both Captain Ahab and
Moby-Dick. It's one of those Golden Keys, like not-two or tat tvam asi,
that unlocks the entire mystery. If truth hath no confines, then all
confines are false. One who dedicates himself to striking through all
confines must eventually arrive at truth. Hence, further.
This is the end of the excerpt. There is much more analysis in the book
Spiritually Incorrect Enlightenment, by Jed McKenna. The analysis is
intertwined with Jed's encounters in the world and the teachings that
arise from them, and with the spiritual growth of a student named Julie
as evidenced through her journal. You can order the book at
And if you don't like Jed, Ahab, or George Carlin, there's always The
Paradox of Time. On the other hand, upon re-reading you may end up
agreeing with George Carlin about it being "a sappy load of shit."
However you penetrate the white whale, whether through apparent action
of harpooning, or the apparent inaction of seeing its suchness, you
have to know and meet it, whether you say it draws you or you are
driven to it. We better know it as I AM, the light at the end of the
tunnel, qualified nonduality. "My teacher told me to hold on to the
sense 'I am' tenaciously and not to swerve from it even for a moment. I
did my best to follow his advice and in a comparatively short time I
realized within myself the truth of his teaching. All I did was to
remember his teaching, his face, his words constantly. This brought an
end to the mind; in the stillness of the mind I saw myself as I am --
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