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Jenny Munday contributes to this issue. In the next issue of the Highlights we'll feature the second half of her article.
In my work (as a Transpersonal
Psychotherapist - 30 years)
I continue to see that we can read, talk about, and pursue
that abstract continuum of Bliss, Nirvana, etc an entire
lifetime but if we don't do the self-analytical work -
finding out WHERE we got those beliefs - WHO gave them
to us, and IF they are really doing for us what we want
them to - we won't change.
Most of the messages say: "Know thyself" or "Seek the
truth and the truth will make you free".
I have a hard time cracking the shell of the ego (or
conditioned belief system of new clients). It takes months
to make them ACCEPT that their thoughts are not even their
own. For that fact will start whittling down the big E-G-O
Anyway, I am attaching the "fact sheet" which I have given
to them after they have had 24 or 36 sessions (when they
seem to be able to handle it). And from then on, I keep
taking them back to the "facts" of how they got to be
who they think they are !!! and this allows them to
continue to say/or say NO to continuing change/improvement
in their life space.
THE CONDITIONING PROCESS AND IT'S CONCLUSION -- Part One
by Jenny Munday
At a certain (pre-destined) point in Life,
each of us arrive at the space where we question "what
is IT all about" -- meaning Life, of course. Meaning "my" life in particular. Previous to this
point, we have just gone on thinking our programmed thoughts and arriving at our programmed
conclusions. But now tragedy intervenes - a loved one dies - a spouse of many years decides to end
the relationship - a child is taken away - or even more often - Life sours. We just can't stand it
any more. None of the toys (wealth - acquisitions - relationships - escape mechanisms (i.e. street
or prescribed drugs, alcohol, etc) work anymore.
We go to the therapist or the priest or the
friend/relative, the medical doctor, and pour out our
heart. We discover that: the friend hasn't time to listen - the relative says "Well, I told you
so.....you never did listen...." - the priest says: " Follow the dictates of THE CHURCH and all
will be well"; and the psychiatrist says: "Take one three times daily as needed (tranquillizers,
anti-depressants, ritilan and you will be fine".
Does any of this advice from any one or
multiple sources solve our problem? The wife/husband still
leaves. The child still is missing. The job is still gone or so dreadfully stressful that we can't
handle it any more.
Life has done it's thing. We don't know how
to deal with it because we were CONDITIONED to believe
that WE - ( my "I" ) was the actualizer of all that came to pass. That my "I" COULD control: the
future ! - other people and their lives ! - any outcome of any situation (if only "I" paid close
attention and exerted the force of My Will upon the situation.
That situation has not seemed to occur. In
fact - the reverse has seemed to occur. It would appear
now (usually in middle age but increasingly in younger and younger groups) that instead of my "I"
controlling the script - that the Script is controlling my I. My "I" now has to become "i" -
increasingly smaller and lesser effective - or not effective at all. Things are happening all over
the place that big I did not program. How is that ?
Is this good news or bad news ? To the
Personality it is BAD NEWS. Mainly because it suggests that
the Person-ality must now let go of that particular belief which says: "I" AM THE DOER". Thus the
personality must now realize it's limitations. It must realize that all those endless thoughts were
only "the mind stream - or the collective tape recorder". It must accept that all those endless
emotions (i.e. anger, fear, resentment, isolation, and even occasional joy, happiness) were also
ONLY passing states and only seemingly cause and affect under the control of the personality - or
So what affect has all that previous
"stuff" ( belief systems, ideas, identifications,
which was imposed on us by society ? For starters, we were CONDITIONED by our parents to believe
that we actually were who they thought we were - the identification they laid on us at birth --
such as the "NOT FAVORITE".
WOW ! how that hit home . Discovering you
are the NOT favorite and having to learn how to play out
that role means (basically) that you will spend the rest of your incarnation attempting to PROVE
that you are "alright !" - not damaged - not insufficient - not inadequate, etc.
So life becomes a journey to disprove the
thoughts of another who has programmed you -- that is ---
someone who has told or convinced you of their view of your identity and future. Since they did
this when we were not capable of competing with their "developed intellect" we "accepted" their
conditioning and their assigning of our role in life.
Shortly after this "education and
schools " took over. By that time we already pretty well had
picture of WHO we were. We WERE ....that "special wonderful princess" or that "NON-FAVORITE" - or
that "UNWANTED PREGNANCY" - or whatever it was that we has been a symbol of to the parent couple
that brought our physical bodies into existence.
We were the physical expression of the
emotional/psychological mindset of the individuals who mated
together and birthed us. OR so it would seem to be. We lived that existence and accepted that role
and even played out that role. But eventually, the role would end and we would come into misery and
desolation (with or without drugs) and ask: "Is there anything more than this ? Is THIS all that is
? Our role as programmed had not played out as it was supposed to. We had done all the "things we
were supposed to do" and we were unfulfilled in the extreme - to put it mildly. We were suicidal
and depressed beyond imagination.
This is the moment of something known in the
non-material spectrum as Grace. It means: " Turn at
the next light and go straight ahead until you see a sign that says: " Here" There is always a sign
- you will never miss it - but you have to SLOW DOWN to see it.
Slowing down equals getting away from the conditioning from all sources. For example:
Parental: "THIS is WHO you are....."
Educational: "YOU are in control...what you DO is WHO you are !"
Theological: "You were born in SIN and
GUILT but if you will follow OUR traditions and doctrines WE
will save you". (Please remember to support THE CHURCH i.e. 10% of income ! for the best salvation
Commercial: "If you buy OUR product -
you will be happy (!) because all your neighbors and friends
will understand that you now own a (fill in the blanks) and therefore you have arrived. You are a
Political: If YOU vote for US (which-ever
political party) we will guarantee you that justice WILL
be done and the economy will rise and wars will cease. (!) (But as an aside-- you do know - don't
you - that the economy is really best when there's war ).
So each of these institutions tell us their
lies and eventually we come to realize that we have
been "programmed" from birth. Then intense anger arises (but we have been taught that "anger" is
bad ! Or intense aloneness/ isolation will arise; but we have been told that we SHOULD not feel
lonely or isolated - so we are caught again. There's no way out it seems.
~ ~ ~
Part Two of Jenny's article appears in the next issue of The Nondual Highlights
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