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Nondual Highlights: Issue #2937, Tuesday, September 25, 2007, Editor: Mark
The path to full enlightenment generally proceeds from a heavily
conditioned state of consciousness, in which attachment and
aversion rule our behavior, through an initial glimpse of
unconditioned aware- ness, to repeated peak experiences of
unconditioned awareness that increasingly infuse our conditioned
existence. This path ultimately culminates in complete freedom
from conditioned patterns and an unbroken resting in the nondual
state of consciousness.
- Peter Fenner, from Radiant Mind, posted to DailyDharma
The First Instant is this ever-present actuality - which is
nothing other than this boundless beingness - the essence of what
you truly are. You cannot move away from this instant and you
never have been anywhere other than right here `in' and `as' this
one and only first instant. This, as a concept, appears to be
considerably challenging for the mind, even though this
obviousness is undeniable for anyone who really examines the
present evidence of what is immediately appearing as the
`presence of what is' which is this world and its nature. From
the individual perspective, one's whole life has been a
never-ending appearance and disappearance of objects in this
immediate living-ness - this first instant.
The direct unmediated knowing is always the primary awareness. It
only appears to be hidden for the `individual', by the habitual
ways of looking, a continual series of fixations on mind content,
and the constant referencing to the `me'.
This immediate awareness, this directness, is the ever-present
actuality and this does not change at all - ever. It is very
subtle compared to our usual habitual ways of looking at the
world, which is nothing much more than `objects' in mind. Words,
names, descriptions and the like are all objects in mind and none
of these actually obscure awareness at all, even though we
believe that they do.
- Gilbert W. Schultz, from The First Instant
To practice anything in order to change oneself is a process of
becoming. A process of becoming involves time. Being present
"this moment" is a timelessness.
But this deserves a deeper discussion:
I've been on a "spiritual path" for my entire adult
life (over 40 years). I am able to look back and see how
differently certain concepts have appeared to me at different
stages. The concept of "living in the present" was one
that was presented to me from very early on. My understanding of
what that means has changed dramatically over the years. This
tells me that saying something like "being totally
present" means widely different things to different people.
How am I to make clear what I really mean?
Early on I understood the notion of "being present" as
simply noticing my sensations in a given moment. I experienced
that as me being in the moment *for a moment*. Being in the
moment in a sustained way -- such as what Tolle talks about -- I
didn't have any notion of.
Being in the moment in a sustained way requires a losing of any
sense of "self". In the moment there are only
sensations. There is no time, nothing persists. All is totally
immediate. To go from experiencing as with a sense of self to a
total immediacy without a sense of self involves a profound
transformation. It is not something that can be comprehended
intellectually, nor can it be "tried" experimentally to
"see what it is like".
As I see it, complete honesty in the face of experience leads to
an end of sense of self and the total immediacy of what is. By
"complete honesty" I mean a dedication to honesty, to
truth, that goes beyond concern for outcomes.
For me experience has totally changed to where I can't really
even speak of "my experience" per se. When sense of
self has died into "immediacy of now", it becomes such
a profoundly alive depth, it is utterly undescribable. It is
continually astonishing, and yet never the same. The very notion
of "what it is like" is even meaningless. Yet that last
statement will be incomprehensible to all but those who already
know directly for themselves. There is a real difficulty in
speaking of that which is beyond description!
Immediacy, what is, the present... is a richly deep and dynamic
vastness (though a vastness that is not a "space" in
that there is no sense of location nor even of "inside"
of...; so the word is used here for its connotation, not its
denotation.). But when experience is through the lens of a sense
of self, it is as if seeing through a tiny straw, and the
fullness of "what is" not beheld.
When experience is fully confronted with complete honesty the
illusory nature of "self" comes (eventually) to be
realized.[1] It comes to be seen that the nature of things
already is detachment, that nothing needs to be changed. A notion
of "waking up" then, is a coming to see unflinchingly
what is, as the distorting lens of "self" dissolves and
"what is" comes to be seen ever more directly.
The account above is not based on ideas or theory, nor is it
based on accounts by others. It cannot really be said that it is
based on "my experience" in the sense that in a very
real way what is written here comes from a place of
"absence". These words come forth from imponderable
silence.
Presumably the sceptical reader will be dissatisfied with this
account. But nothing can be done.
A reasonable question remains to be addressed, if not answered.
If "the moment", Now, is timeless, and so nothing
persists in Now and there is no continuity in Now... then how is
it that things appear to continue? The clock on the wall
continues to tick, the refrigerator continues to hum. Or, what is
perhaps the same question put a different way, if the moment is
only sensation, how is it that there is what is not only
sensation, such as ideas, and things (in the world)?
That is perhaps the most difficult question for which I have
sought an an explanation for some time. The short answer is that
things only "appear" to exist and continue. [Note that
to exist and to continue are essentially the same, hence the two
quesions above are essentially the same.]
There is at this moment alive, vibrant sensation... "what
is" teems with sensation, yet the typing goes on. There is
no "sense" of the typing as an "act", there
is no "sense" of a "someone" doing the
typing, there is no "sense" of a topic or of a point
being made. There is no "steering" involved. All is
happening of its own. If there is any magic, that is it. But it
has always been happening of its own. Before it seemed as if
there were someone doing what is done. Now it is clear there is
no one doing.
The difference between "normal functioning" and
"selfless functioning" is in the absence of a sense of
self as driver of what is going on. The sense of
"oneself" as a driver is an unnecessary encumberance
that clouds full, open consciousness and creates distortions in
both perception and action.
- Bill Rishel, posted to The_Now2
Wisdom occurs when you drop barriers you have erected through
your concepts and conditioning. Wisdom is not something acquired;
wisdom is not experience; wisdom is not applying yesterday's
illusions to today's problems. As somebody said to me while I was
studying for my degree in psychology in Chicago years ago,
"Frequently, in the life of a priest, fifty years'
experience is one year's experience repeated fifty times."
You get the same solutions to fall back on: This is the way to
deal with the alcoholic; this is the way to deal with priests;
this is the way to deal with sisters; this is the way to deal
with a divorcee.
But that isn't wisdom. Wisdom is to be sensitive to this
situation, to this person, uninfluenced by any carryover from the
past, without residue from the experience of the past. This is
quite unlike what most people are accustomed to thinking. I would
add another sentence to the ones I've read: "If the heart is
unobstructed, the result is love." I've been talking a great
deal about love these days even though I told you there's nothing
that can be said, really, about love. We can only speak of
non-love. We can only speak of addictions. But of love itself
nothing may be said explicitly.
- Anthony de Mello, S.J., posted to The_Now2
1.
Walls
How can I turn myself in all
directions
in this
One moment?
Why does the sitar
fill my heart?
How does the hollow flute
empty
my Soul?
Where can I call Home?
There are no walls here.
2.
Masks
i can not kiss your lips
with this mask
between us
i can not write
words
to remove your name
like lines of poetry in
the hands of water,
come
burn with me
in this pyre of desire,
let nothing stand
between us, not even
these eyes.
come
through this opening
in the sky.
- Anna Ruiz, posted to The_Now2