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#3536 - Monday, May 18, 2009 -
Editor: Gloria Lee
The Nonduality Highlights - http://groups.yahoo.com/group/NDhighlights
As It Is, Not How We Want It to Be
Rather than worry or obsess about
enlightenment, why not be honest and accept that we will have our
good days and our bad? We will have some enlightened moments of
loving-kindness, as well as some dull ones. This encourages all
of us to stay real and experience the moment as it isnot
how we want it to be.
Donald Altman, from Living Kindness (Inner Ocean)
In order to come to that which you
know not, you must go by a way in which you know not.
- St. John of the Cross
Garrison Retreat 2008
So this is what makes our time together enjoyable, actually, when we are interested in whats real. Cause Reality is the most rich amazing thing there is. Of course reality is the only thing there is. You see Reality isnt something thats hidden in a tea cup. Its not like its the essence of the cup. Immaterial unformed essence. Theres a reality in here. Of your body, theres the essence of you as if theres some little ghostly immaterial thing floating Thats nonsense, thats a fantasy. (knocks on the table) This is reality. This is what youve got to deal with. This is where you always come back to, isnt it? You know you have those little spiritual vacations? You might sit in meditation and run into samadhi state. Its wonderful. And your mind is very quiet. Who knows what happens, you get taken up into the 18th realm. Did you every ask yourself, Why is it that I keep ending up back here. (knocks the table) Every spiritual vacation I take, that I hope is going to last forever, I keep ending up where? (knocks the table) Right here. You ever noticed? You have some mind blowing revelation and it lasts how long? Couple hours, couple days, couple weeks, couple months, 6 months and then where do you end up? (knocks the table) Pretty much where you started. You end up right back here. Right? Does that make sense.
The day I realized that was like mind-numbing. It wasnt blowing, it was numbing. Like damn! Literally it took years for it to occur to me, till I asked myself, Why is it I sit and I meditate and I meditate and I meditate, meditate, meditate cause thats pretty much what I did. Why is it every once in awhile, not that often, once in awhile Id have some amazing experience and its just really lovely and groovy and fantastic and I think this might be it. And then why is it I always end up back here? And I thought if I always end up back here, why do I keep pursuing over there? That was the mind-numbing insight. When I realized I keep pursuing over there, this place I call Nirvana or enlightenment or awakening. Ive got awakening or enlightenment somewhere other than here. Even at that time, I had read all the books, I knew they said, Right here, right now. I heard all that but its not like here here, right? (laughter) Its like Im sure it will be like here without totally being here. You know, In this world but not of it. Like 2 worlds, one Nirvana, one here. Walking the edge of the relative and the absolute without losing balance. Something like that, you know? (laughs) And then it hit me, why do I keep ending up back here and I thought maybe because back here is where its at.
Maybe theres something here (knocks). The very place where I dont want to be, maybe theres something here.
Spirituality that leads to awakening is really about having our answers questioned. Having our world-view questioned, having our self-view questioned and having our spiritual view questioned. Thats spirituality. Or as St. John of the Cross said In order to come to that which you know not, you must go by a way in which you know not. I dont know if youre impressed by that but its one of the most lovely pieces of spirituality, In order to come to that which you know not, you must go by a way in which you know not. Its lovely and its easy to forget. Go by a way in which you know not. To unknow is much more useful than to pile up knowledge. To unknow things. Dont worry, I dont mean unknowing like everything you learned in school, well maybe some of the stuff you learned, but most of it will probably be there intact for better or worse when its all said and done but to unknow. Unknow who you think you are. To unknown it. How do you unknown it? You let yourself see that you actually dont know. Thats the beauty of a question. The beauty of a question highlights what we dont know, right. What am I really, what am I ultimately really and truly, absolutely? What really am I? What is the person sitting in this chair? What am I really? Thoroughly, absolutely. What am I? The question gets you to that place of, I dont know, quickly. In order to come to that which you know not, you must go by a way in which you know not. And then you get to that unknown and then you stop right in the unknown, in that experience of not-knowing. Something very potent could happen if you let yourself not-know. You stay in that experience of not-knowing.
So in satsang actually we come here to unknow. Thats my hope anyway.
posted to TheNow2 & Wisdom-l
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