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Reflections of the One Life, by Scott Kiloby
Non-duality is not a learned subject
Although many words are
used to point to enlightenment or non-dual presence, non-duality
is not a philosophy or learned subject. Although it is
often treated as a philosophy, the word non-duality is pointing
to life itself. You are that life. You are not a
person separate from life who must learn the subject of
non-duality, memorize it, and tell the story that you have it or
get it. You are it. The pointers are pointing the
mind into a relaxation, an unlearning of all the positions,
philosophies, opinions, and beliefs that make up the "me."
Proof of awareness
Although it may be helpful to recognize pure awareness so that there is confidence that awareness is what you are, enlightenment is not a permanent state of total cessation of thought. The notion of reaching some future state where nothing is arising is a carrot the mind places out beyond your reach. It is perfect fuel for the search. Besides, even if there is an experience of total cessation of thought, it is only an experience. Experiences are temporary. They come and go just like every other temporary form.
Enlightenment is not a particular experience. It is a realization. And every single experience is proof that awareness is already here. The experience of reading this reflection could not happen without awareness. Thoughts, emotions, experiences, states, and all other things cannot happen without awareness. These things arise in awareness. They are not separate from awareness. So every experience is proof positive of awareness itself. Every experience is enlightenment. That is either realized or it isn't.
Enlightenment is the
seeing that absolutely everything is arising from absolutely
nothing. In that realization, there is nothing on which the
mind can fixate, including on the idea of future awakening, the
ideas of no self or nothingness, the idea that one must have a
particular experience or find some state of total cessation or on
any other idea. Yet, paradoxically, it is seen that every
idea is an expression of awareness.
In these reflections or other pointers, you may hear words like, "allow thoughts and emotions to arise and fall." But do you even have control in allowing thoughts and emotions to arise? Allowing still implies control, doesn't it? It implies that there is a person who has control over what arises. Is that true? When you see the word "allow" used in these reflections, the word is pointing to the natural and effortless noticing of what is already happening. The word has nothing to do with personal will or effort.
Thoughts are arising. Emotions are happening. There can only be a seeing that this is already the case.
When you hear, "allow this situation to be as it is," what that really means is notice that this situation is already happening in exactly the way it is happening.
In that way, noticing is allowing life to be just as it is. Even when there is no noticing, that inattention is also just happening. Life is living itself, whether there is an awareness of what is happening or not. In that seeing, seeking, resistance, and suffering end. Yet if seeking, resistance, and suffering arise again, notice that these movements are also just happening beyond your control.
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