Jerry Katz
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Highlights #416

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Friday, July 21, 2000


Thank you *all* for such rich movement around my question.

Thank you Jan for responding. It is good to hear your voice here again.
Your words are sobering and ring clearly.

I don't know, however, that I align with your assessment that
"unconditional love" leads to enmeshment and the tolerance of
conditions. Perhaps we speak from a different understanding of "UL". UL,
as I know it, engenders no movement. It shows up as awareness and flow.
By it's very nature, there is no someone being moved to tolerate. It
shows up when the vessel is empty. I know it as unmediated fire.

Thank you Dan for standing with me and for your seamless capacity for
deconstruction. You and Gene both do this so well. The layers were
peeled back.

I have printed out all of the responses. I am sitting with their flavor.



Hi Christiana,

As far off the nondual track as the statement appears, there
are many nondual perspectives. It doesn't matter what
perspective is taken as long as it becomes a meditation. It
doesn't matter what the perspective is on either, whether
it's death or cheez whiz. It doesn't matter whether it's
constructed, deconstructed, reconstructed, or unconstructed.
How can anyone tell YOU anything? However, it's fun to hear
everyone, to read great writings posted here, to hear
myself, to fill up the web pages and plan meetings. Just be
with me.



Wouldn't it be nice if reality
were consistent?

Wouldn't it be consistent if reality
were nice?

Reality doesn't fit our fantasies
nor our expectations.

It's not static, nor does it change.

Reality is never the same,
but it never changes.

A zebra is not a zebra.
Thus, it is a zebra.

-- Dan



Hello Melody,

How apt was your drawing of "Success" yesterday. It's
been on my mind since then.

I know that I'm in a trough right now, and perhaps
that has been affecting others. I've been ready for
a personal retreat for awhile, and, being in the trough
it's a little harder to recognize that fact.

On the lighter side, the beauty of success, is that
truthfully, it can be seen that the troughs have their
value as well. And, there's always the certainty
of another peak.

Juan Matus says, "A warrior must use the first of a series
of events as an outline for that which is to come".

Of course, recognizing the "first" of a series is most difficult.

Knowing that these cycles exist, is useful in such an endeavor,
and in his case, being impecable, in detection and response.

Impecability, is a very difficult goal. If I had it, I would have
detected my trough... or perhaps more honestly said, reacted
to my trough sooner.

That it is difficult however is no excuse not to attempt to reach
such a goal. Impecability also brings freedom.

Impecability, complete independance from personal motivations,
complete dedication to intent (of THIS) and complete openness
to the spirit.

It is a daily honor.

I know you work hard, you have inspired me in your capacity
to readdress difficult situations. And I know you have a very
willing heart.

What am I saying? Thanks for being here and
thanks for Osho's Zen Tarot.


Thank you, Dave.

I haven't heard the word impecability spoken of so
impecably since I used to visit a dear friend of mine in
Cloudcroft, New Mexico. I loved the way you used

What occurs to me to ask you is: would you be in
such a trough if you weren't comparing 'where you are'
with where 'others' are..... or maybe where you'd
*rather* be?

For me, too, it is difficult to recognize....not that I'm in
a valley as compared to a peak....that's EASY to see.

What's hard to recognize, or admit to myself, is my
refusing to delight in where I find myself standing.

Last week, embracing my sorrow so completely, I
tasted the wonder and awesomeness of Life. In
doing so, the peak and the valley became one.

May you taste that as well today.




Hi All,

Try it this way:

'God' issues us a 'blank check'. We can fill in the amount and cash it.

Experience fills in the amount, and it is called 'identity', or what
some refer to as 'ego'. I prefer the term 'identity'.

We try to 'cash' our check to 'get' the rewards for having 'learned
by experience'; in other words, we assume that our experiences are
like 'money in the bank', which we can spend for forwarding of our
mission of becoming whole and complete. This takes various versions,
such as 'healing', 'enlightenment', 'realization', etc.

We assume that there is something to learn, which has 'redeeming' or
'transformative' value; we fill in our check to that amount, and then
try to capitalize upon it or 'cash' it.

Now, there is an unseen trick in this, however. 'God' gives us the
blank check, but also slyly provides everything for free, AKA
'Grace'. What we have, then, is a situation in which a person has
access to all the 'money' (experience => identity-structure) they
want, but in reality, money is never needed, because nothing really
costs anything. It is all freely available at 'Grace-Mart' (which is
wherever you are).

Seeing this seeming paradox, a person is free to erase the asking
amount on the check, to return it to the blank condition, and live by
Grace alone.

We have here another tie-in to Freud's second-stage ('anal')
retention-related period of development, which is known to be
centered in 'control' of self and other. Persons 'fixated' or stuck
in this phase, are renowned 'control-freaks', who use their own
conditioned (retained) self as the metric or standard by which all
others are to be compared and judged. It is no surprise, then, that
the retentive tendency works on the basis of equating money with
identity-pieces, accumulated and retained (saved) for 'making a
better life'.

An 'identity-crisis' is similar to unexpected bankruptcy; a person
sees themself to be without the essential underpinnings of existence,
money/identity. This is a crisis only because of the unexamined
assumption that money/identity is actually needed. In this case, a
person will often feel hopeless, having 'lost' the precious check and
the amount of experience it represents, all the while unconscious of
the free abundance all around. It is the expectation that something
is 'attainable' (income), and that it can be used to 'get' a benefit,
which makes the building of an acceptable personality, the equivalent
of the 'Pearl of Great Price'. Perhaps you have read that classical

So, the blank check, the availability of experience, the assumption
that something can be gained, the careful or haphazard construction
of an identity-structure, the fanatical retention of this precious
article, and the expectation that all of that can lead to better
place, to the removal of suffering, is all occurring in an
environment which features FREE goodies, as much as are needed.

It seems to me that it takes a while to see that bankruptcy of
identity is actually an opportunity to go on 'welfare'; to become a
'worthless welfare bum', living for free, with no worries of having
to hoard experience (AKA 'learning'), identity Being freely provided
by Self.

==Gene Poole==


To say this is unknown
and unknowable is
saying too much.

It's not even unknowable,
that how unknowable it is.

Captivated by the unknowability,
there is nothing left.
I've given myself over,
so there's no giving
and no over.

Remarkable, amazing, unbelievable,
these are just words.

Ah, words - resonating, helpless,
infinite wheels spinning.


>Ultimately, how can any experience be false? How can any statement be true?

Even the experience of having taken the rope for a snake can't be said to be
:); it is probably one of the most insightful experiences one can have and of
this statement is only a statement :)



If we defined irritation (in this context) as having an inflamed or
resistant reaction to what is being said....

it is the resistance ...or the rejection... of what is being said
that creates the 'effect' (which has in this case been labeled
as 'harm').... and not the words themselves.

Often, as you indicate yourself, the mind participates
in a deception. The mind can say "I accept", even
when subconsciously it is rejecting or resisting.

You used in your response below the phrase
"knee jerk reaction" to describe a subconscious
reaction. And in my experience, that's right on.

I have found that by listening to the body (mine or others)
one can discover when and if the mind is being duplicitous.

It's a good 'key' to unlocking and exposing
our denials.

Another way I can tell if it's 'projection' is if I can't
seem to let it go, or drop it.

If I want to either hold onto magnify it;

OR, if i want to throw it away....obliterate it;

either way, I know it's my mirror.

On the other hand,

I used to live next door to a couple who fought allot.
About once a week I would hear screaming and yelling
and occasionally even hear some object crash up against a

To suggest that everytime I heard one of these
fights and thought, "sounds like they're at it again"

I was reflecting my own inner anger -

is just not so.

There are times, as in sports announcing,
when one is simply reporting what's being
played 'upon the stage'.



I'm posting this for Sandy Jones ([email protected]), a beautiful friend in
Ojai, California. As the webmistress and literary executor of the William
Samuel estate, she has just updated the William Samuel website at . I think she's also a member of NDS and/or
HarshaSatsangh! She edits a printed newsletter, and also handles the
distribution of William Samuels' books, audio and videotapes.

William Samuel (1924-1996) was a remarkable teacher, a true American
original. He had been exposed to various Western metaphysical teachings,
and then while stationed with the U.S. Army in Asia during WWII, he learned
Taoism. He synthesized these Western and Eastern understandings into a
sweetly compelling non-dual, heart-filled, down-home American idiom in
WITHIN US LIVES!, and 2 + 2 = REALITY. Although not widely known by the
spiritual community, Samuel wrote books, received visitors and corresponded
with his readers from his home in the American South for almost twenty
years. Here is a quote from A GUIDE TO AWARENESS AND TRANQUILITY:

"There are not two selves, God and me. Or, we could say,
there is not God and humanity. There is God and God being
Self-aware. God's Self-awareness is this Self-being-reader,
aware of these words. There is no other "you" or "me."

There are some related sites. Sandy has her own site at and features a book called CELESTIAL SONG
coming out soon. Excerpts are on this site. She communicates with
irrepressible joy, lightness and charm. As she says about her book, "This
book is for any one who wishes to be happy and carefree. These little
glimmers of light will lift your heart." Even her site itself looks happy.
Who can resist?

Another site is maintained by Rose Burrows at , for contributions by those attracted
to William Samuels' teaching. Check out the moving butterfly-pointer and
falling flower petals on these pages!

With love,

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