Jerry Katz
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Highlights #920

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12/16/01 Sunday



see image in attachment:disposable camera#1


Sometimes there would be a rush of noisy visitors
and the Silence of the monastery would be shattered.

This would upset the disciples;
not the Master, who seemed just as content
with the noise as with the Silence.

To his protesting disciples he said one day,
"Silence is not the absence of sound,
but the absence of self."

One Minute Wisdom - Anthony De Mello
Gujarat Sahitya Prakash 1985



I am is always deeply grateful for people like you and Sarlo for
the immensity of patience and love that you have offered through
your work - upside down inside out, round and around, agreeing
disagreeing, I hope you never give up - never can give up, never
did give up.



Have you tried "changing the channel"? Try that space
between channels, the one with nothing on it... Gene

interesting view point,

the one changing the channels between nothing and everything
is the one with 'nothingeverthing' on it.

The 'channel changer' flipping to and fro between everything
and nothing

The channel changer is also a channel, channelling everything
and nothing and anything in-between

after all, nothing is everything, everything manifesting as
nothing. if that not suffering then was is not?

The way i see it is, the mirror never touched the reflection, the
reflection never touched the mirror. awful amount of seperation

never ever meeting.. god never entering creation, man never
entering God, round and around, suffer we do, we that are not
God or man..

are we simply not able to honestly be suffering itself.. no buts..
no if's...



Hello Jack...

You wrote, in response to my letter to you:

><[email protected]> wrote:

>Exquisite Jean,
>As always with and always and around and around in all ways,
>you're exquisite posting makes the icicles on the front gate
>twinkle in the sunlight.

Glad to share...

>When I speak of suffering, I'm not talking about psycholoigcal
>wounding from a traumatic past, I'm talking about the fully
>identified me disidentifying the realisation that one is that but
>then as that realising it is also desired me.

I think I got that...

Let's see; you are saying that you are experiencing a somewhat
'painful' disjucture; that for you, these two things do not fit
together, as you have imagined or hoped that they would, or
perhaps as you believe that they 'should' fit.

It is the comparison, the seeing of the two, each so powerful
and real, which arouses your passion, which you name as
'suffering', as you realize that each is a natural feature of
reality, yet, they are incompatible; and for you, for
reasons which I can only pretend to understand, is an issue
of sadness.

Is it the same, as suddenly finding yourself as a 'grown man',
when only a moment before, you had been what you had
always been, a 'boy' or youth? Is it a similar nature of shock?

Is the boy now dead, and thus, to mourn? If you attend
his funeral, where is his body?

And is it the same, as when you (or someone) has prepared
an elaborate, beautiful meal, a work of art to be treasured,
and then as you are eating it, you realize that it is now gone?

The 'identified self' (what we could refer to as 'self before
realization') is like the boy or the meal; it is an intermediate
phase, or stage, which is meant to be consumed, and then
to live only as a memory. I am that one, who has the memory.

>It's like a giant ocean liner entering into a small harbour. When
>there is authentic realness the 'me' can never accept the gigantic
>ocean liner. There is so much unconscious fear and unspoken

We are vulnerable to what we 'harbor'.

>The source or God which is not separate from the manifestation
>wants to experience itself in every one of its forms and in
>meeting form it has to meet itself fully consciously as that form.

Yes! And, It is doing so, in every moment, as 'everyone'.

>And as that form which is in space and time it ultimately fears its
>demise hence this constant never-ending suffering.

The caterpillar (you know, the fuzzy little guy with 50 legs) may
fear it's own 'death', and so, it protectively wraps itself in many
lengths of silk. It does retreat into it's hiding place, for
self-preservation, but as you know, it emerges as a butterfly.

Does the caterpillar know of the utter transformation? Probably
not; but in that caterpillar, lives the butterfly. The early form
will 'die', giving everything to the later form.

It is this way with our utterly natural way of Being, as humans.
We build and protect and fear that what is good and precious
for us, will be taken (by death or loss). Only later do we come
to understand, that it is the holding-onto, the clinging, which
is the actual article of suffering. Yet, we are designed to cling,
exactly like the caterpillar is designed to weave a protective

>Joseph Campbell said it so eloquently, the whole thing is just
>sorrow in extreme rapture.

Yes, I do understand better now, what you are meaning by
'suffering'. Personally, I allow myself to have the sorrow and
the rapture. I have found that both are harmless, if I can
resist the (conditioned) impulse to put meaning to those
natural events.

I have deliberately removed myself from the
company of authoritarian, fundamentalist persons, whose
judgements I formerly sought. And I have purged from myself,
and continue to purge from myself, any toxic remnants of my
former associations with those 'type' of person. I can have
experience free of meaning. In that powerful emptiness,
arise meanings whose beauty and import I would have
never guessed. I suggest to remove the meaning of death.

>Gene, whatever you post whether it\s about viruses or cosmic
>consciousness, the depth and beauty of it is simply exquisite.
>May the ocean keep on roaring.

Thank you, Jack

Congratulations for your use of English. I understand,
that between languages, each language is felt or sensed
to be metaphorical of the other language. I say that you
are doing well, catching the actual metaphor.

==Gene Poole==



Hello Rashmi...

You asked:

><[email protected]> wrote:
> > Gene wrote:
> > Does the caterpillar know of the utter transformation? Probably
> > not; but in that caterpillar, lives the butterfly. The early form
> > will 'die', giving everything to the later form.
> >
>caterpillar does not know of the utter transformation. does this mean
>that we do not have to know anything to be trans-formed?

Yes. Knowledge is not necessary. Beliefs can also be expectations;
every expectation can be an obstacle.

For most of us, it is 'too late', having been submerged in a vat
of opinion, opinion disguised as 'fact'. Having this handicap, it is
best to refine what knowledge we think we have, by means of
removing expectations, which are also the root of resentment.

I can say that it is 'better to observe, than to conclude'.

>we are
>already that but do not know it.

We can know it. But it is not necessary to know it. Nor does knowing it
convey any particular virtue.

>so between the caterpillar and the
>butterfly- that time phase, do we have to accept our not knowing,
>just living and accepting each moment with or without is
>said we are timeless, so how does timelessness come into this?

To abide, is to eventually let go of time.

Generally, we incorporate time as an important part of our
many strategies; if we abide, we are not compounding
strategies. If we do not compound strategies, it is possible
to release our attachment to our favorite version of time.

>i got
>the point when you mentioned that there was no difference between a
>boy and grown up man. the boy became man on his own, there was just a
>shift. so it is something natural. so naturally we shall become
>it.but we do not accept this fact. we want to be that here and now.

Could it be a combination of expectation and impatience, as
stimulated by the experience of suffering, known as frustration?

>but also why do we have to rely on time.accepting the fact that
>we shall become that in the near future is relying on time. but we
>are told that we are already that why do we like the
>catterpillar just have to wait to be transformed?

As I pointed out, the butterfly (later form) lives inside the caterpillar
(first form). Inside of you, lives the one which you will become.

If you 'exercise' your current form, if you use it constantly to
meet goals which are embedded in expectation, that is the one
you are Being. It is like, trying to drop a habit, while continuing it.

If you allow your current form to complete its 'mission'
with as little resistance as possible, your inner Being will
have room to grow, and soon, you will find yourself
Being That.

Another way of saying, is that all of our expectations, beliefs,
habits, frustrations, and resentments, all of our attachments,
are the 'cocoon' which we are now so carefully encasing ourselves in.

We think we are protecting ourselves, but our close
attachments stifle and suffocate us. The more we
feel threatened (vulnerable), the more intensely
we cling.

The way out of the encasement of attachment, is to eat
the web we have woven, to accept it into ourselves, and
to learn to enjoy every bizarre bite. It is good to cultivate
a sense of irony, as a spice to counteract the bitterness
of the taste of our own errors.

"Live and learn".

>accepted if you
>tell me to wait but you say that you are that here and now. does it
>mean that there is no difference between knowing and not knowing? we
>are that and that's it.

That is it, essentially. Please understand that our awareness
is able to grow in ability to penetrate and "know". Rumi and Hafiz
give examples of becoming aware of this gradual opening, which
at some point can look like a sudden opening.


In abiding, we do not have the pain of frustration, for
we are not attempting to 'do'. Without the habit of
berating ourselves, we are able to enjoy. In enjoying,
we are able to drop our ineffectual baggage of

The most important thing, is to have
compassion for yourself.


==Gene Poole==

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